Ok, this week's post was going to be something different, but since you are thinking about creating a registry soon, I thought I would finish off this series of posts instead.
Here are a few more things that are great to have with a little baby (though I didn't use any of these with Jack until he was a month old or more)
A Diaper Genie: actually, I used this right from the beginning, but I forgot to include it in the first post. I thought these were stupid, but someone lent us one and I became a convert. You really can use any kind of pail or garbage, but (if you're using disposable diapers) the Genie is great because it keeps in all the bad smells. The inserts are a bit expensive, but you can get them at Costco, and (at this point) each insert lasts me more than a month.
A playmat (with a mirror): I also used to think these were really unnecessary, but it was the first thing Jack would do on his own. It was such a blessing -- Jack could suddenly amuse himself for a few minutes while I made breakfast, showered, or just went to the bathroom. Amazing.
A bouncy chair: Jack wouldn't sit in it at first, but around two and a half or three months he would sit in his chair for a few minutes. It gave us an alternative to the mat because sometimes he was happier sitting up a bit more. It became a staple at our house -- I put it in the bathroom and sat Jack in it when I showered.
A swing: Especially one that reclines (so baby can be in it when she is really little) and swings side to side. By four months, Jack did well with a back and forth swing, but he preferred a side to side motion when he was smaller.
Cuddle bag: this was the fabulous thing that went in Jack's carseat and kept him cozy all winter. I LOVED it because you're not supposed to put bulky jackets or snowsuits on a baby in their carseat (so the straps are tight enough). I have to admit when I put Jack in the seat and zipped the bag up around him, I was always a little jealous of how comfortable he looked...
Something interesting for baby to look at during diaper changes: Jack had those black horses on the wall that he would just stare at, so changing was never really an issue. At least not until he could roll over.
Board books: Even when he was really little, there were a few books (like The Very Hungry Caterpillar) that Jack liked looking at. And by three months, he seemed to really like being read to and looking at books. (Now, however, I can almost never get him to sit and read with me. Too much to do, obviously).
Until he was about three months, Jack didn't really care about any of his toys, so don't worry too much about having a bunch of toys at first. You'll play with them more than the baby will.
Wednesday, September 26, 2012
Tuesday, September 18, 2012
Consignment 101
I know you said you are planning to head to the big consignment sale in Okotoks later this fall. Having just come home from a gong show of a shopping experience at a consignment sale nearby, I've come up with my top six tips to survive the giant Okotoks sale.
1) Fewer people is better: People come in droves to the big sales. And many of them bring their children. I guess they do it because they don't have a choice (or they want to test things out on their kids bell buying?) but it means that the rooms are usually PACKED. It can be a bit overwhelming, so it's nice to have someone with you, but if you bring too many people, it gets really hard to keep track of everyone.
2) Make a list: Big sales draw so many people because there is so. much. stuff. All kinds of stuff. It's easy to get totally overwhelmed and either buy everything you see, or feel like turning around and leaving. Before you go, make a list of a few things you would like to find at the sale. Be honest with yourself about what you don't mind getting secondhand and what you would prefer to have new. It's only worth buying something secondhand if you'll actually use it.
3) Price it out: If there are a couple of bigger items you are looking for (like a swing, stroller, or bassinet), look around online and see what you would pay for a new one. Sometimes consignment is a great deal, sometimes not so much. Sometimes the price difference is small enough that you might be happier buying something new and picking exactly what you wanted.
4) Bring reusable bags: If you are looking for smaller items (clothes, books, baby toys), your hands can get full quickly. A few reusable bags help a lot.
5) Arrive early: These sales are like regular garage sales -- people get there really early. You'll have the most choice right at the beginning. If you just want to go to look around, then you can skip the early part and go later when it might be a bit quieter.
6) Remember it's your first: People love to buy gifts for babies (especially first babies) and lots of people will want to give you useful things. They'll want to see a registry. So don't bother buying yourself too much too soon. Because really, isn't it more fun to get gifts than spend your own money?
1) Fewer people is better: People come in droves to the big sales. And many of them bring their children. I guess they do it because they don't have a choice (or they want to test things out on their kids bell buying?) but it means that the rooms are usually PACKED. It can be a bit overwhelming, so it's nice to have someone with you, but if you bring too many people, it gets really hard to keep track of everyone.
2) Make a list: Big sales draw so many people because there is so. much. stuff. All kinds of stuff. It's easy to get totally overwhelmed and either buy everything you see, or feel like turning around and leaving. Before you go, make a list of a few things you would like to find at the sale. Be honest with yourself about what you don't mind getting secondhand and what you would prefer to have new. It's only worth buying something secondhand if you'll actually use it.
3) Price it out: If there are a couple of bigger items you are looking for (like a swing, stroller, or bassinet), look around online and see what you would pay for a new one. Sometimes consignment is a great deal, sometimes not so much. Sometimes the price difference is small enough that you might be happier buying something new and picking exactly what you wanted.
4) Bring reusable bags: If you are looking for smaller items (clothes, books, baby toys), your hands can get full quickly. A few reusable bags help a lot.
5) Arrive early: These sales are like regular garage sales -- people get there really early. You'll have the most choice right at the beginning. If you just want to go to look around, then you can skip the early part and go later when it might be a bit quieter.
6) Remember it's your first: People love to buy gifts for babies (especially first babies) and lots of people will want to give you useful things. They'll want to see a registry. So don't bother buying yourself too much too soon. Because really, isn't it more fun to get gifts than spend your own money?
Wednesday, September 12, 2012
Is This Your First?
I would be standing in line at the grocery store. Or waiting for an elevator. Or buying lunch. It would happen.
A stranger (who would be pointedly staring at my belly) would ask, "When are you due?" That question would be followed in quick succession by several others. Almost always the same questions, in the same order.
"Do you know if it's a boy or a girl?"
And always
"Is this your first?"
That one always stopped me. What would make them ask that, I wondered. Why did that seem like such an important question to everyone?
A few days ago, I saw a woman standing in a line, rubbing her belly. I smiled at her. "When are you due?" I asked.
"Do you know what you're having?"
And then, it almost slipped out: "Is this your first?"
Surprised, I stopped myself before I said it. But suddenly, I understood. I knew why all those people had asked me.
I think I used to be a little put off by the question because I felt like I was being judged by people who thought they were way more experienced parents and knew way more than me. I felt like they looked at me like I didn't have a clue what was coming. But that's not really what it is.
Those people actually did know more than me, and I actually didn't have a clue what was coming. But they weren't asking because they wanted to point out how naive I was. Now I think they were asking because, when it's your first, everyone wants to be the person to throw you the lifeline. Other parents think back on those early days of parenthood (though they can be hard to remember through the fog) and grasp desperately to give you the one piece of advice that might save you. That might dry your tears at two in the morning. That might calm your fears that you're not doing a good enough job. But in that brief moment in the grocery store, or the elevator, or in line, they can't. The experience of being a parent is too big, the words, too small.
So they ask if it's your first. They smile a warm, knowing smile. They wish they could offer more, but they can't really. They know you'll figure it out.
And then one day, not that far down the road, you'll see the pregnant stranger. You'll wonder if she's already a parent and if she knows what awaits her. Because (by then) you'll know. You'll want to say something helpful. Something supportive and encouraging. But you have to start somewhere.
"Is it your first?"
A stranger (who would be pointedly staring at my belly) would ask, "When are you due?" That question would be followed in quick succession by several others. Almost always the same questions, in the same order.
"Do you know if it's a boy or a girl?"
And always
"Is this your first?"
That one always stopped me. What would make them ask that, I wondered. Why did that seem like such an important question to everyone?
A few days ago, I saw a woman standing in a line, rubbing her belly. I smiled at her. "When are you due?" I asked.
"Do you know what you're having?"
And then, it almost slipped out: "Is this your first?"
Surprised, I stopped myself before I said it. But suddenly, I understood. I knew why all those people had asked me.
I think I used to be a little put off by the question because I felt like I was being judged by people who thought they were way more experienced parents and knew way more than me. I felt like they looked at me like I didn't have a clue what was coming. But that's not really what it is.
Those people actually did know more than me, and I actually didn't have a clue what was coming. But they weren't asking because they wanted to point out how naive I was. Now I think they were asking because, when it's your first, everyone wants to be the person to throw you the lifeline. Other parents think back on those early days of parenthood (though they can be hard to remember through the fog) and grasp desperately to give you the one piece of advice that might save you. That might dry your tears at two in the morning. That might calm your fears that you're not doing a good enough job. But in that brief moment in the grocery store, or the elevator, or in line, they can't. The experience of being a parent is too big, the words, too small.
So they ask if it's your first. They smile a warm, knowing smile. They wish they could offer more, but they can't really. They know you'll figure it out.
And then one day, not that far down the road, you'll see the pregnant stranger. You'll wonder if she's already a parent and if she knows what awaits her. Because (by then) you'll know. You'll want to say something helpful. Something supportive and encouraging. But you have to start somewhere.
"Is it your first?"
Wednesday, September 5, 2012
Lifeline
I went to high school with a girl who is also named Caitlin. I met her when I worked on a show she was acting in, but she graduated the year I started high school, so I didn't know her very well.
Flash forward more than 10 years. We had both moved to Calgary, where we were both teachers (she teaches high school drama). Her husband is a director who has worked at ATP. We connected a couple of times at parties or openings, but that was it. By the time we moved back to Ottawa, I hadn't seen her in at least a year, maybe more.
But a funny thing happened. We were both part of the same Facebook group for new moms in Calgary, because, by chance, she had a baby girl about three weeks after I had Jack. And through the magic of the internet, we connected over the fact neither of our babies slept. We started emailing back and forth when the babies were four or five months old.
That was more than seven months ago, but Caitlin and I still send emails every couple of days. Even though we never managed to get together with our babies before we moved, I would still count her as one of the people I know I can tell almost anything to. Because I know she understands. Because I know she won't judge. Until we connected, I felt like everyone had a baby who slept perfectly. Like everyone else was getting to love every minute of being a new mom while I struggled through my days as a sleep-deprived zombie. But when I found someone whose baby wasn't a perfect sleeper, someone who was as obsessed with sleep as I was, someone who was honest about hard days (and nights), I felt as though a huge weight was lifted because it wasn't just me anymore.
Finding other parents to connect with is really nice when you have a baby. They are people who understand what your days are like and don't mind that you have nothing interesting to say about ... well... anything much. They don't comment on your wrinkled clothes, messy house, or lack of makeup. But for me, finding another parent who was (and, right now, still is) dealing with the same issues as me hasn't just been nice. It's been a life saver.
When I heard about all of your friends who will have new babies around the time of yours, I was so happy for you. Being a mom is amazing, but like I've said before, it can be an incredibly tough job, so I'm so glad for you that when you need a lifeline (in the form of another mom) you'll have people nearby. And of course, I will always be another parent you can talk to anytime you need. Especially since, chances are, I won't be sleeping anyway.
But a funny thing happened. We were both part of the same Facebook group for new moms in Calgary, because, by chance, she had a baby girl about three weeks after I had Jack. And through the magic of the internet, we connected over the fact neither of our babies slept. We started emailing back and forth when the babies were four or five months old.
That was more than seven months ago, but Caitlin and I still send emails every couple of days. Even though we never managed to get together with our babies before we moved, I would still count her as one of the people I know I can tell almost anything to. Because I know she understands. Because I know she won't judge. Until we connected, I felt like everyone had a baby who slept perfectly. Like everyone else was getting to love every minute of being a new mom while I struggled through my days as a sleep-deprived zombie. But when I found someone whose baby wasn't a perfect sleeper, someone who was as obsessed with sleep as I was, someone who was honest about hard days (and nights), I felt as though a huge weight was lifted because it wasn't just me anymore.
Finding other parents to connect with is really nice when you have a baby. They are people who understand what your days are like and don't mind that you have nothing interesting to say about ... well... anything much. They don't comment on your wrinkled clothes, messy house, or lack of makeup. But for me, finding another parent who was (and, right now, still is) dealing with the same issues as me hasn't just been nice. It's been a life saver.
When I heard about all of your friends who will have new babies around the time of yours, I was so happy for you. Being a mom is amazing, but like I've said before, it can be an incredibly tough job, so I'm so glad for you that when you need a lifeline (in the form of another mom) you'll have people nearby. And of course, I will always be another parent you can talk to anytime you need. Especially since, chances are, I won't be sleeping anyway.
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