Babies R Us

I love to shop.  Most often, I don't buy anything, but I love shopping anyway.  In fact, I think you'll find this is not my first post about shopping (and it's not my last, either...).

One of the places I end up browsing fairly often is Babies R Us.  I love looking at all the things you can get for a baby -- all the clothes, toys, and gear.  I think I told you how much I loved creating a registry for Jack.  I agonized over so many of the choices I made, but I still loved the whole process.  It made the idea of my baby real and I loved picturing him using all the things I was picking.  So Babies R Us holds some pretty nice memories for me.

But recently, something else has started to happen there. . .

I've become this nice-but-slightly-crazy lady who smiles (a little too much) at the pregnant ladies carrying baby bathtubs.  Who grins a little too hard at couples trying to pick out crib sheets and monitors.

Because something has suddenly dawned on me:  I'll never be that person again.   I will never again be getting ready to welcome my first baby.

It's not exactly that I'm sad; mostly sentimental.   Waiting for my first baby was exciting and scary and totally overwhelming.

But what I didn't quite grasp at the time was that it would only happen once.

When Jack was brand-new and something wouldn't go how I imagined, part of me would think "well, at least he's not going to be my only baby, so I'll get a chance to try that again some day."  And I still believe that -- he won't be my only baby.

But he is, and always will be, my only first baby.  And that's something pretty special.

Getting ready for a baby isn't perfect, and life with a newborn (or older baby, or toddler) is almost never the same as the fantasy you have in your mind.  But when you can look past the piles of new clothes to wash, the monitors to unpack, the gear that is slowly taking over space that was once yours, take a minute to enjoy it all.  To appreciate the peace and quiet of the only time you will prepare to welcome the first new life to your family.

Because before you know it, you may be the one smiling wistfully at the Babies R Us moms and dads and their carts full of brand-new stuff.